During the COVID-19 virus and social isolation, this group will be a place to gather until the in-person groups return. 

I intentionally made this group for late in the day on Friday as we collectively transition into the weekend. Maybe partners will be more available in the next few days and you want to celebrate a weekend activity. Or you want to review the challenges of the week with others and feel acknowledged.

Groups will be held online via the HIPAA-compliant level of Zoom.
You can either attend via zoom.com on desktop or the Zoom app on your phone or tablet.

Instructions for the Zoom calls

Beware that when you login, you’ll go straight into the meeting but your microphone will automatically be muted.  When you want to talk, you can EITHER unmute yourself or the facilitator (Rachel) will unmute you.  She will also remute each person when they aren’t speaking to avoid extra sounds complicating the conversation. 🙂 

Once in the meeting, please click on your name in the screen and edit it to have your first name, your baby’s name and baby’s age.  Additionally, the video will automatically be on so everyone can see you…for safety and protection of all involved, if someone logs in and we can’t see you and don’t know who you are, you will be taken out of the meeting. 

Please post your first and last name, your town and your email address in the chat OR text it to Rachel at 617-446-5322. 

The fee will be $5, to be paid electronically via the link below (honor system…)

https://checkout.square.site/buy/G3ZCH7WJSOPTTS6KOXB2MVNF?fbclid=IwAR3hhgHzrBPYMpnpwS8zg47KzIUktWgbyIDuGxTc-IE-dKSrJ-Cpnvy7qFE    

NOTE: If you are on MassHealth or WIC, you may attend for free, just message a photo of your card to the group facilitator, Rachel Simpson, IBCLC at 617-686-0052 or email it to her at info@simpsonlactationservices.com.

                 Feel free to invite friends from afar, too!!! 

As an adult, words have always mattered to me. I have become sensitive to correct use and I hear mistakes all of the time that I would like to correct. I was exposed as a young child to correct grammar. My father was an ESL teacher in the South Bronx for 30+ years. He would correct my use of grammar when I was learning and even into my teens he would correct the use of nuanced words that so many people confuse. For example, it is better to say I speak English well, rather than I speak good English.

Language is fluid and changes over time to match society’s needs and evolution, says Stephanie Wagner BSN, RNC, IBCLC, RLC. At this year’s Lactation Consultant in Private Practice conference, I was schooled on some new to me words that have been in use for years. I was so grateful for Stephanie’s talk on Dispelling Myths, Understanding Terms, & Sharing Cases to Create an Inclusive Environment For ALL Families to Optimize Our Care! I am excited to share with you what I learned!

I am a part of the L.G.B.T.Q.Q.I.P.2S.A.A. community. At this time in my life I am proud to be a straight, cisgender female Ally. An Ally is a person who is not LGBTQ+ but uses their “privilege” to support LGBTQ+ people and promote equality. The “+” is a symbol for everything on the gender/sexuality spectrum that words and letters can’t describe or there is no known word for (yet!). The Gay Liberation Movement began with gay and lesbians, then to LGBT and then to LGBTQ+. My dad would take me to the gay pride parades in NYC. Just like language, human connections are fluid and change over time to match society’s needs and evolution. I feel included in a community to which one time I felt disconnected. Now I have many opportunities to connect within this movement. My responsibility to help babies and their families as an ally means I offer myself as an Inclusive Healthcare Practitioner/IBCLC, that I proudly work with the LGBTQ+ community and I am open to helping ALL families on the LGBTQ+ Spectrum.

Her talk was one of the day’s highlights for me. I appreciated her transparency and quick wit. As a lesbian cis-gender female lactation consultant, Stephanie works within the LGBQT+ community in the NYC area. She talked about her work in various ‘gay-bor-hoods’. Love that. The experience of assisting two chest-feeding men to latch their baby was fascinating. She describes the definition of chest-feeding as “Term used for either anatomical, psychological, sexual, or gender reasons for any person who considers their nipples (or lack thereof) to be part of a chest and not a breast and uses that part of their body to comfort and/or nourish a baby.”
I appreciated being informed about the language to use because many people in this community are going to have children and it would benefit providers, like me, to know which terms would be most appropriate to them. You can listen to the entire podcast from her case study here.
When millennials were asked in a study ‘what is gender’ some answers were ‘not given, changing or doesn’t exist”. Here is some clarification on some of the new terms that have evolved over the last decade to describe gender identity and sexual orientation.

Gender identity is one’s concept of self as male, female or neither.

Genderqueer is outside the strict female/male binary. People may exhibit both qualities of male and female or a combination of male and female.
Gender expression is how we express our gender identity; clothing, hairstyle, language (body & verbal), etc.
Gender nonconforming (G.N.C.) means to express gender outside traditional norms associated with masculinity and femininity; Not all G.N.C. are Transgender
Gender neutral prefers not to be described by a specific gender; Prefers “they” as a singular pronoun
Gender reassignment is confirmation of new gender by taking medical steps such as hormonal therapy and/or surgery to change their body to match their gender; Transexual

When you consider each person has their own individual journey and even though they may appear to be male or female, it may not be how they identify. Gender has always existed in language BUT in the binary, says Stephanie. Female/Male/She/Her/He/Him are pretty limiting, she continues. We are to remember the importance of pronouns such as They/Them/Their/Thon. All new language is an attempt “to solve the challenge of describing yourself or another person who identifies as neither male or female.”

Here is a review of the meaning of the letters L.G.B.T.Q.Q.I.P.2S.A.A.
Lesbian= Attracted to female
Gay= Male mostly unless you talk about the group
Bisexual= Attracted to both male and female
Transgender= A transman= woman at birth changes to man, transwoman=man at birth changes to a woman (700,00 people across the country)
Queer or Questioning=An individual who is unsure of and/or exploring their gender identity and/or sexual orientation.
Intersex= They are born with one sex but raised as another (they are 1.7 of the population but we really don’t know exactly. )
Pansexual= Attracted to a person or a soul and the packaging doesn’t matter to me
Two Spirit (2S): Umbrella term of unifying various gender identities and expressions of Native American/First Nations/Indigenous individuals • Predates LGBTQ+ terminology; Two Spirit culture went underground to avoid detection and prosecution
Asexual = Agender or aromantic
Ally= A person who is welcome in the community who are straight allies!

The American Dialect Society (ADS) decides what trends are happening in the linguistic world. The society “is dedicated to the study of the English language in North America, and of other languages, or dialects of other languages, influencing it or influenced by it.” They study the most used new term each year. In 2015 it was Mx. This is a substitute for Mr., Mrs., Ms. and Dr. Some words to insert rather than mother or father are parent, patient, person or people AND they, them, their and thon. Her way of remembering these are to think of using your “P’s and T’s” or as she likes to think of it, please and thank you’s. Others are Ze, E, Ey (3rd person pronoun), Hir, Xe, Hen, Ve, Ne and Per. Stephanie urged us to leave out the word “preferred” on our intake forms. “They are not preferred, they are.” You might consider including multiple parent options too so that a single parent may not feel that she/he/they are missing half of themselves by limiting your options to two. It would also be more inclusive to polyamorous families.

The take home is to simply meet a person/client where they are at and use the terms that works for them. Ask them, don’t assume! In the spirit of my father, correct others language because it will help raise the consciousness. Challenge homophobia every day in every way. For an even more thorough article on this topic, please click here.

I am excited to share that my website has a new look and design.

What better day to launch it than TODAY, MARCH 6th, WORLD IBCLC DAY, a day we recognize and honor those who support parents on their journey feeding new babies. On this day we remember IBCLC’s in our communities and around the world. I will thank my colleagues for their amazing work in this field. IBCLC Day was developed to recognize the important role of the International Board Certified Lactation Consultant and the specialized knowledge each has to make a difference in the lives of families.

My new site has many new features, the most important being the software for parents to communicate with me within the website. I have spent many hours researching the most efficient, HIPPA compliant platform for my clients and feel that I chose the best one. It has online scheduling ability so that families can chose their own day and time to see me. This can be accomplished even during the middle of the night when baby is awake. Then once a consult has been booked forms will be sent directly to their email to fill out in advance of our consult.

Also, clients will have the ability to pay ahead of time so that during our consult we can focus on the mother and baby’s needs. The site will have a new area for blog posts on important topics, including nutrition and self-care, traveling with babies, family balancing and more. I have included a beautiful page of my breastfeeding in art collection of images from around the world, wherever I have seen images of breastfeeding, I capture that. If you are interested in finding specifics about each image, I will be happy to share those with you. On the Services page you can see all of the options available that I provide, including a brief note as to what to expect in that particular service and the pricing.

The site designer is Claudia Palmira, my friend from elementary school with whom I reconnected after 30 years. We discovered through Facebook that we were both living in Rome (me part-time, her permanently). I was happy to chose her to redo the website which as you will see has a harmony of color and design, a flow which is user-friendly and easy on the eye. I learned during the site redesign the importance of adding a personal touch. You will see that in her design, she has captured the essence of my practice.

I am offering with my new redesign website, a special offer! If a past client refers me to friends or family, the new client will get a reduced fee of 20% off the consult fee for the first consult. This does not apply to follow up visits.

Thanks for reading all the way through and for sharing my news!

Rachel Simpson IBCLC, BS

Spending time with my family as an American in Rome

First published on La Leche League website

In Italy and other parts of the world there exists the “transumanza.” This is the Italian term for the traditional twice-yearly migration of sheep and cows from the highlands to the lowlands, and vice versa. The word literally means “crossing the land.” Each year, for 12 years, give or take, my family and I have been making a similar crossing, albeit of the ocean, to live in Italy for cultural exchanges, language learning, educational growth, and to show our children a different way of life than the one we lead in Massachusetts, USA.

This tradition has had its difficulties as well as rewards. As a mother of three young children, trekking to Italy with them in packs, slings, strollers, or “incinta” (pregnant), there have been many opportunities to observe similarities and differences between Italian and American families and traditions. Throughout these years, one constant for me has been La Leche League International and I’ve witnessed how this amazing organization supports mothers in their journey, wherever it may take them.

Our children are ages 12, 9, and 7 years old. There is no better opportunity for children to learn a foreign language than in these precious early years. Our travels did not begin with the idea of forming little international citizens, but rather with our desire to take the opportunity for enrichment early in their lives by spending time abroad. As a mom, an LLL Leader, and an IBCLC, I have a great interest in the customs of breastfeeding and parenting in all cultures.

Over this past decade when I was breastfeeding my babies in Italy, I hardly ever saw another mother breastfeeding in public. At times some grandmothers would give me a sweet wink, others would tell me that my milk wasn’t enough, depending on their age. Typically, older grandmothers would be more accepting since they missed the push for formula feeding in the mid 1950s and ‘60s. In 2003 there were no apps to direct me where I could nurse or how to find a restaurant with a changing table. My resource was La Leche League International. The English group in Rome gave me great comfort as it has many other expats. The flow of their meetings was similar to the groups I had attended across the Northeast region of America. I could rely on LLL to be the emotional support that I needed during my time with little ones in the foreign city. Even the expression, “many mothers have found,” the common verbiage of Leaders, gave me the sensation of being at home.

Throughout our years in Rome I have been a part of this LLL group, as a mother, as a Leader Applicant, as a Leader, and as an IBCLC. I love going back year after year and seeing the new babies! Nowadays I see many mothers stopping for a coffee, with shopping bags in the stroller, nursing the baby. Typically, the babies and the breasts are uncovered. This is so important for young women (including my daughters) to see. Now my girls tell me whenever they see a mother breastfeeding! They understand the importance and this is such a significant first step for young women! For the first time yesterday, at different times of the day, I saw two very proper Italian mothers carrying their toddlers in slings to and from work. One can typically see very small babies (but not toddlers) being carried in this fashion.

The data from Italy’s Institute of Statistics say that the number of breastfeeding mothers increased from 81.1% in 2000, fell to 80.3% in 2005, and went up to 85.5% in 2013. The mean duration of breastfeeding was rising too, from 6.2 months in 2000, to 7.3 in 2005 and 8.3 in 2013. The mean number of months of exclusive breastfeeding was equal to 4.1, with important regional differences: the highest value was 5 months in the province of Trento and the lowest was 3.5 in Sicilia. The rate of breastfeeding mothers was higher among foreign citizens (89.4% vs. 84.6% of Italian mothers), as well as the duration of breastfeeding, which was 9.2 months on average among foreign mothers and 8.1 among Italian mothers. (1)

I feel a new sense of responsibility having witnessed the influence of U.S. parenting practices on the world. I saw an Iranian mother in tears share her story of guilt for having followed the advice of Dr. Spock. Spock’s Baby and Child Care 1946 (with revisions in nine editions up to 2012) sold over 50 million copies and advocated feeding babies on a strict schedule. This mother had left her son to cry for hours in his crib. We need to do so much better as a nation whose influence on the world is so widely imparted. I am determined we should normalize the course of breastfeeding so that women around the world will return to their own cultural practices. These include, natural birth (the cesarean rates around the world are high and on the increase), eating a diet more suited to one’s own country (not fast foods), and knowing how to breastfeed from having seen other women doing so.

The C-section derives its name from the Roman ruler Caesar and was performed in Roman times when a mother was over ten months pregnant or close to death. Women never survived the operation. Modern technology saves lives but the rate of cesarean births is unnecessarily high.
At the same time that Dr. Spock was writing his books other “[d]octors exacerbated erroneous perceptions around breastfeeding and started spreading misinformation about its alleged negative effects on maternal health, i.e., the mothers’ vision would decrease, their teeth would decay and they would gain weight. Simultaneously, giving birth was becoming a very medical procedure, especially in the North. This led Italy to have a caesarean section rate of 40% today. Since the process has now peaked in the North, we are now starting to return to natural births. In the South however, where medical intervention arrived later, caesareans are now flourishing at 60% to 80% in some parts.” (2)

These past two generations have witnessed an enormity of formula marketing and fortunately we are seeing a trend away from that. Manufacturers of artificial infant food were spreading all throughout the world wreaking havoc on societies. Feeding babies on breast milk was going against this new wave of “medicine.”

“The feminist revolution paralleled the invasion of the first multinational companies shortly after 1968 and in the years following. This combination was deadly for breastfeeding in Italy. Nursing began to be regarded as backwards, old fashioned and something an educated woman would not choose. Economic differences are very strong between northern, central and southern Italy and as a result, perceptions around breastfeeding and birth varied regionally. Because Northern Italy is wealthier and more industrial than the South, this anti-breastfeeding wave spread first in the North.” (2)

After a recent Rome LLL meeting, the daughter of the Iranian mother I mentioned approached me to ask for help at her own baby’s arrival in July. I told her I would not be in Italy then, but promised to communicate by email and help her in a wider capacity than in my “hands on” role through my work in the U.S. both professionally and through my volunteer role with LLL, incrementally changing the culture of birth and breastfeeding practices for future mothers like her.

References

1. ISTAT Pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding in Italy Year 2013
2. Siliquin, B. Breasts are for Babies? Perceptions of Breastfeeding in Italy. In Culture Parent June 2011

h5 More